I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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