oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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