I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize