I wanna bring you to show and tell
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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