I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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