He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize