Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize