I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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