6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
The air taste purple.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
