she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
