omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
