Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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