found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
