I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
