Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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