i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
