your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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