I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
And then he peed in my hair
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