no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
