I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
You made out with two different species that night
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Randomize
