he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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