If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
