Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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