i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
