Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
