It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
