yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
