And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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