I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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