Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize