I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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