I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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