Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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