Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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