he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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