She's JV to your varsity
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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