I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
