Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
