ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
no more duck duck goose at the bar
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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