I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
