I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize