You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
