Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
