Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Randomize
