my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize