I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
