whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
