So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
