i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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