Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Moan for me like Helen Keller
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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