But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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